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Confessions of a Las Vegas! Poker Junkie
Monday, February 7, 2005
A cool blog to check out
Mood:  accident prone
Now Playing: Nickleback - Should've Listened
Heres a cool blog to check out, written by an army dude on the front lines.... Do they have lines there? I dont know.... But anyways, he is a tank driver or commander or something, and he is also a decent author.....


Armor Geddon

J

Posted by J at 10:10 AM PST
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Saturday, February 5, 2005
Writers Bloc
Mood:  lazy
Now Playing: Afroman - Colt 45
Sorry its been awhile. I still dont feel like writing much, but heres a little somethin someone sent me. Read on.......

Two couples were playing poker one evening. John accidentally dropped some
cards on the floor. When he bent down under the table to pick them up, he
noticed Bill's wife Sue wasn't wearing any underwear under her dress!

Shocked by this, John upon trying to sit back up again, hit his head on the
table and emerged red-faced.

Later, John went to the kitchen to get some refreshments.

Bill's wife followed and asked, "Did you see anything that you liked under
there?

Surprised by her boldness, John courageously admitted that, well indeed he
did.

She said, " Well, you can have it but it will cost you $500."

After taking a minute or two to assess the financial and moral costs of this
offer, John confirms that he is interested.

She tells him that since her husband Bill works Friday afternoons and John
doesn't, John should be at her house around 2 p.m. Friday afternoon.

When Friday rolled around, John showed up at Bill's house at 2 p.m. sharp
and after paying Sue the agreed sum of $500 they went to the bedroom and
closed their transaction, as agreed.

John quickly dressed and left.

As usual, Bill came home from work at 6 p.m. and upon entering the house,
asked his wife abruptly. "Did John come by the house this afternoon?"

With a lump in her throat Sue answered "Why yes, he did stop by for a few
minutes this afternoon."

Her heart nearly skipped a beat when her husband curtly asked, "And did he
give you $500?"

In terror she assumed that somehow he had found out and after mustering her
best poker face, replied, "Well, yes, in fact he did give me $500."

Bill, with a satisfied look on his face, surprised his wife by saying,
"Good, I was hoping he did. John came by the office this morning and
borrowed $500 from me. He promised me he'd stop by our house this afternoon
on his way home and pay me back."

Now THAT, my friends, is a poker player!

Posted by J at 9:27 AM PST
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Wednesday, January 19, 2005
Vegas Babay, Vegas!
Mood:  vegas lucky
Now Playing: Some more 80's s#$t
Well hello, everyone, I am typing from the same internet cafe as before, from vegas. I left on the spur of the moment, with $1500 of tournament winnings in my pocket. I havent told you about that, but more to follow.

I was stuck almost $300, playing the 4-8 at Bellagio, I had put my name on the 15-30 list, but nothing was open....

I sank down to $180, below the minimum buy in at the 15-30, but I won a pot to get to $240, just above the minimum. I wen to the 15-30, and wouldnt you know, I made the nut flus with mt k9 of diamonds and won a pot, taking me $100 over what I came with (Including drinks, dinner and entertainment from the night before.) I quickly cashed in and came here.

more to follow.....

Jeff

PS. if anyone reads this and wonders where I am, I am still in vegas till thursday.... Sorry dad, I said I would call you for lunch, I still will, but it will probably be from lunch.....

J

Posted by J at 8:29 AM PST
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Wednesday, January 12, 2005
Hillarys Challenge
Mood:  lazy
Now Playing: Killer Mike - Addidas
Thought this was amusing.




The picture shows that this soldier has been thru Survival School and learned his lessons well. He's giving the sign of "coercion" with his left hand. These hand signs are taught in survival school to be used by POW's as a method of posing messages back to our intelligence services who may view the photo or video. This guy was obviously being coerced into shaking hands with Hillary Clinton.

Posted by J at 7:45 AM PST
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Tuesday, January 11, 2005
Thank You God!
Mood:  sharp
Now Playing: Nate Dogg ft. Ludacris - Real Pimp
Unless you've been hiding in Saddam's hole for the past 24 hrs, you know that the Jazz finally won a game. The amazing part is that they beat the Spurs. They hadn't beaten them since 2000. 18 games. Props to the Jazz for finally kicking that monkey off their back. I still believe, I guess......

J

ps. I got tickets to see Jazz/Suns wednesday. For free. ;>

Posted by J at 10:52 AM PST
Updated: Tuesday, January 11, 2005 10:54 AM PST
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Simply Disgusting
Mood:  incredulous
Now Playing: Lil Jon & The East Side Boyz - Nothins' Free
The supreme court decided this was OK. Something about free speech. I am a firm believer of peoples right to say what they want and express themselves, but this is just wrong. No matter what. Sick.


Posted by J at 10:48 AM PST
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Sunday, January 9, 2005
Wild Poker this Weekend
Mood:  spacey
Now Playing: Denver vs. Indy 2nd quarter
Lots of action this morning. 4 guys and over $1500 on the table being passed back and forth. The game was 1-5 but everyone had overs up to $35. Some $200-300 pots every few hands. It was fun to deal because the action was so interesting, and they were all hooking up the dealers (me) pretty good.

Played in a capped out 2-5 at the rainbow yesterday and got pretty lucky, taking a little more than $400 in less than 1 hr. I only played 5 hands to the flop, and I won 4 of them. Love it when that happens....

My tournament woes continue, since the win last Friday I am a miserable 0 for 3. Time for a break I think.

Found a cool house to rent, I just hope that its still available when I call Monday morning. It has a garage, so if I get it you will see alot more pics as I customize the Benz.

Gotta get back to the game....

J

Posted by J at 11:02 AM PST
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Thursday, January 6, 2005
Like the Colors?
Mood:  spacey
Now Playing: Enigma - Club Mix
This is what its gonna look like soon......


Posted by J at 8:03 PM PST
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My Own Soap Opera
Mood:  lazy
Now Playing: Oingo Boingo - Weird Science
Well, I celebrated my daughters 7th birthday. We went bowling at Fatcats. It was skating last year. Nickelcade the year before. Or jungle Jims, Im not sure. I did manage a 160 something, and I usually get a 120 or so. Pretty amazing. Aurie loved the digital camera I gave her, she and her sister were taking tons of pictures all afternoon. I gave her a globe? thingy that I bought in Vegas last month. Its one of those clear bubbles filled with water and sprinkles with a little sculpture of New york city in it. Looks like its snowing when you shake it. What do you call those things?

I have officially jumped off the wagon of the Utah Jazz. I am a Miami fan forthwith. Flash is awesome to watch, and who doesent love the Diesel? Better than seeing the Jazz self destruct in the second half of every game.

I saw Meet The Fockers yesterday. It was hilarious. Randy and Horny Focker? They went overtime on this movie. Be prepared to laugh for an hour or so straight. I was wore out by the time it was over.

J

Posted by J at 6:38 PM PST
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Sunday, January 2, 2005
Happy New Year
Mood:  a-ok
Now Playing: Afroman - Colt 45
Just a quickie. Happy New Year!

ps. won the tournament friday, hit a $130 2 teamer for $468 - you could say its been a good weekend!

Gott go, I gots me some company......


J

Posted by J at 8:19 AM PST
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Thursday, December 30, 2004
Stuff You might Need For Later
Mood:  energetic
Now Playing: American Hi Fi - Another Perfect Day
Take away the right to say "f**k" and you take away the right to say "f**k the government!".
-- Lenny Bruce

Do you wake up in the morning feeling sleepy and grumpy? Then you must be Snow White.
-- David Frost

An American girl hit on me in a club and asked me to make her an Egyptian princess. So I threw a sheet over her head and told her to be quiet.
-- Ahmed Ahmed

I bet a lot of mimes choke to death because nobody believes they're really choking.
-- John Gephart

Yes, time flies. And where did it leave you? Old too soon...smart too late.
-- Mike Tyson

I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I only lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three.
-- Elayne Boosler

Skill is successfully walking a tightrope over Niagara Falls. Intelligence is not trying.
-- Anonymous

Posted by J at 2:28 AM PST
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Suds
Mood:  hungry
Now Playing: Jay Z - 99 Problems
ps. Laundrys done.

Posted by J at 2:14 AM PST
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Poker's Taking off at the Bay
Now Playing: 3am Sportscenter
The Jazz are pitiful, I just want to get that out of the way right off.

I came into 2 games on Monday, a first I believe. We had been lucky to spread a game in the last 2 months. I had been getting alot of days off. kinda kills the check, you know?

Both games were very soft, all you had to do was wait for good cards. Not too much action so it was easy to steal the pot, even when your cards didn't hit.

I'm thinking mid January would be good for another Vegas trip. The action there was just too much fun to miss for more than a month or two. I hope Carrot Top is gone from the MGM before then.

Whatever happened to Dennis Miller? He used to be funny, but he has turned into this news automaton that is almost too painful to watch. Oh wait, it is!

Thoughts are with the tens of thousands who lost their lives around the Indian ocean in the huge waves. Mind numbing to even think about.

J

Posted by J at 2:12 AM PST
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Monday, December 27, 2004
I Still Cant Catch This Guy!
Mood:  hungry
I am close, but not quite there. Here are the current standings for my fantasy league team. I am in second place, behind the leader by 140 or so.

RK Your League 12/26 Total Prize
1 a lost in space 159 5865.5 2023.5 TSNP Back
2 one2ruplayas 137 5721.5 2167.5 TSNP Back
3 Hard Knock's 232 5200 2689 TSNP Back
4 Kiss Of Death 162 5132 2757 TSNP Back
5 Leonardo 91 5023.5 2865.5 TSNP Back
6 TOP GUNZZ 67 4924.5 2964.5 TSNP Back
7 blizzards 166 4861 3028 TSNP Back
8 commandos 116 4681.5 3207.5 TSNP Back
9 cavs 114 4538.5 3350.5 TSNP Back
10 Byrant Did DO i 74 4454.5 3434.5 TSNP Back
11 Brick City Slam 88 4364 3525 TSNP Back
12 Moonknightt 137 4103.5 3785.5 TSNP Back
13 Poopoocaca 124 3828 4061 TSNP Back
14 gappers jumpbal 52 3731.5 4157.5 TSNP Back
15 Warriors101 144 3628.5 4260.5 TSNP Back
16 pimpin 0 3392 4497 TSNP Back
17 WARRIORS 124 3387 4502 TSNP Back
18 tmen111 38 3083 4806 TSNP Back
19 hoopers 0 0 7889 TSNP Back
19 "bANgerS" 0 0 7889 TSNP Back


My Current Fantasy Roster:

Wade, Dwyane MIA 12/27 ATL 23.6 5.6 7.4 0.0 1170.5 $8,240,000
Hinrich, Kirk CHI 12/28 NJ 15.0 3.8 6.7 33.0 781.0 $6,330,000
James, LeBron CLE 12/28@ATL 24.6 6.8 6.9 65.5 1292.5 $9,720,000
Chandler, Tyson CHI 12/28 NJ 8.6 9.5 0.9 20.0 651.0 $3,710,000
Okur, Mehmet UTA 12/27 SEA 12.5 7.2 1.8 0.0 684.0 $4,310,000
LaFrentz, Raef BOS 12/28@DAL 10.4 8.2 1.1 18.5 659.0 $3,480,000

Posted by J at 7:22 PM PST
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Laundry Sucks
Mood:  lazy
Now Playing: Jazz vs Sonics - tied at the half
Laundry is not the first thing I wanted to do when I finally got out of bed today. Oh well.



Posted by J at 7:11 PM PST
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Christmas and Poker - What a Combo!
Mood:  incredulous
Now Playing: Jazz vs. Sonics - 2nd Qtr 36-28 Sonics
WOW! The jazz really look bad. Really bad. Too many turnovers. I'm still getting used to the idea that Seattle is a good team, since they haven't done anything noteworthy since Shawn Kemp was under 300 lbs.

Christmas is finally over, and I am not the least bit sorry. No more pressure I guess. I was dreading working this past weekend because I thought it would be slow. Instead, we were reasonably busy and the money was real good.

The last hand of the night early morning Sunday was kind of exciting. Not only does 'L' pull four deuces, but he hits $500 on the wheel too. He is a class act in my book, because he gave out over $100 of his winnings to the dealers and other players at the table.

Poker play and sports has been good this weekend also. I only made 1 bet this week, $110 on the Patriots. Winner! It made up for my only loss of the weekend - playing poker at the Rainbow and losing $100 the same day. Had to try it again since I made a quick 300 the day before. I had one of those hands that I will remember for a long time.... KJ of diamonds, I flopped 2 kings and a 3 (2 hearts). Slow played it, and caught the jack of hearts on the river to make the absolute nuts (Kings full of Jacks). The hand wasn't remarkable except that this poor kid made the nut flush on the river and thought he was the best hand. Rainbow allows unlimited raises when heads up, and I'll be damned if this idiot raised and re raised me until he was all in. It should have been an $80 pot, but he jacked ut up to about $200 in no time. Thanks dude, whoever you are.

I want to send out a special thank you to everyone who helped make my Christmas a good one. You all know who you are!

J

Posted by J at 7:01 PM PST
Updated: Monday, December 27, 2004 7:03 PM PST
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Wednesday, December 22, 2004
The names have been removed to screw the guilty out of any further glory...
Mood:  chillin'
Now Playing: Johnny Cash - I Walk The Line
This is pretty much verbatim from the incident report I filed at work. Sorry its been awhile since my last post, but I've been busy with assorted bullshit like this. I figured that my report would be good reading, so for those of you who know the people involved, enjoy.

Sometimes being in management sucks.....



I arrived to start my shift in the Montego Bay poker room at approximately 11:20 pm on Sunday evening, December 19th. I observed that there were two $1-$5 Texas Hold'em games in progress on tables 1 and 3. There were three dealers present: D C, H F and K S.

I proceeded to count the bank with K and then released her to go home for the night. I took her place in the rotation and started dealing the game on table 3 at 12:30 am. I recognized several players including A, T, T's sister (Name Unknown), T's friend L, A R, another player known only as "Mr. Raise", and 1 or 2 others I cannot recall.

The player everyone was calling Mr. Raise was generally playing blind, and raising the pot at every opportunity, basically playing with his eyes closed. He was also winning most every pot. There was a lot of `table talk' going on, and the atmosphere was pretty competitive. Nothing was really out of line, but there was a lot of complaining by most of the players directed at Mr. Raise, due to his unorthodox style of play.

The first comment I heard that was out of line was when L stood up after he and Mr. Raise were heads up in a pot and yelled to Mr. Raise "I am going to beat your ass this time bitch". I stopped play and warned L that any further outbursts like that would not be tolerated. Of course, Mr. Raise won the pot and broke L, who left shortly after. T became involved heads up with Mr. Raise and lost a few hands later. She stood up and yelled at Mr. Raise to "shut the fuck up and don't talk to me." I gave T the same warning I gave L.

T quickly asked me to please tell Mr. Raise not to talk anymore. I explained to her that unless what he was saying was malicious, disrespectful or used foul language, he could talk all he wanted, and if she didn't want to hear him talk, she would have to be the one to leave. After that, the table was pretty quiet for ten minutes or so.

Over the next ten minutes, a few players had lost their money and left table 3, which became shorthanded with only 5 players. The only people left were A, T, T's Sister, A R and Mr. Raise. After a few hands with very little action, A asked me if he could move to the game on table 1. I looked over and quickly counted 7 players in that game. I explained that I was not able to allow him to move because it would be unfair to the rest of the players to allow him to move and leave table 3 with only 4 players and put 8 players on table 1. He became upset and left quickly, muttering loudly that he was going to speak with whomever was in charge of the entire casino because he should be able to sit wherever he wanted, regardless of how many players were at any given table. I found out later that he went and spoke to R in the pit. T and her sister got up and followed him out of the room.

I was left with only A R and Mr. Raise on table 3, so we moved them over to table 1 and closed table 3 for the night. I released H to be off work, but she stayed and waited for an open seat in the game so she could play. I had spoken with both H and D about what had been happening at the table 3 while they were dealing and we all agreed that it was T who was instigating the talk, and that if anyone was being disrespectful it was her. None of us felt Mr. Raise had done anything wrong other than play poker very badly. Granted he received some warnings for language, but it was nothing used in a disrespectful or malicious manner, just lots of adjectives.

There were no further problems after we combined games and I felt that the situation was back to normal (although Mr. Raise was still playing very unorthodox, but the table change seemed to slow his winning streak a little). After about ten more minutes, A came back into the room and demanded to know why I allowed A R and Mr. Raise to move to the other game. I told him that they were the only players left in the other game, so they had first right of refusal to the open seats on table one. He still wanted to play, so we placed him first on the list. Sure enough, Mr. Raise broke another player so I was able to get A back into the game with only a few minutes delay.

About 1 hour later, around 1:45 AM or so, I was dealing when I heard A, seated across the table from me and to the right, call out to F, a player seated directly to my right. A asked F if he knew what "passive aggressive" was and F replied that he did. A then asked him "Don't you think that's a chickenshit way of handling things?" F didn't really answer, and nothing more was said between them.

The remarks from A struck me as very odd, because he and F weren't conversing otherwise. I didn't say anything until about 10 minutes later when D relieved me in the dealer's box. I went to my locker for a minute and then sat down behind A. As soon as I had his attention I quietly asked him about his comment and whether it was directed towards me. He said that it was and that I should have kicked out Mr. Raise because he was "disrespecting women". I had not seen anything like that happening, and I told him so. I apologized for not letting him move to the other table and tried to explain why. He cut me off and called me a "spineless chickenshit". I immediately stood up and walked away. As I was walking off, he raised his voice and called me "chickenshit" again. I immediately returned and quietly explained that one more outburst like that and he would be removed from the poker room, and very quickly. He didn't reply, and didn't say anything further to me until he got up from the table about an hour later.

T had returned to the room a few minutes before his outburst. After I had warned him and walked away a second time, she sat down behind him. They had a whispered conversation, both of them occasionally looking at me. I briefly considered asking T to leave because she wasn't playing and had been a problem earlier, but decided against it because they were being quiet, and I felt that the situation had passed.

About 20 minutes later T left the room for the night. A continued to play for another hour or so and then left the table. He brought his chips up to the counter. I asked him if I could cash him out, but he said "No, I just need you to call J in security for me." I called J while A moved over to the side of the counter, blocking my exit with his wheelchair. While we were waiting for J, I apologized to A about having a rough night in the poker room. He didn't reply.

J arrived and A immediately turned to him and said "I want to have a witness to hear what I am about to say to Jeff". He then turned to me and raised his voice, telling me that I was the most spineless piece of chickenshit...... I immediately asked J to get him out of the poker room. A protested, but J explained that I was the boss, and if I said he had to go, he had to go. A wouldn't leave, and he continued to shout at me calling me "fucking spineless" and "chickenshit" over and over, mixed in with a few other curse words and accusations. J stepped between us, and I retreated from the counter, my back turned and not saying anything. J called Code 4 on the radio (removal), and another member of security showed up right away. A continued on his tirade, stopping in his tracks a couple of times to call me more names. As they were going down the ramp, I told J that an 86 was warranted also. After A left everything returned to normal, and I finished my shift a few hours later.

I would like to add that A was a good customer, playing lots of hours and generally being a good poker citizen. He had spent the previous week here playing poker all over town, and although he was pretty high maintenance he was generally a liked by everyone. We had a few issues with him the previous weekend regarding things like playing in turn and not slowing the game up. It seemed his favorite thing the first two days was to ask a totally unrelated question every time the action came to him, slowing up the game considerably and irritating several players. I had a very short, friendly conversation with him about it, and he stopped doing it. We had no problems with him for the rest of the week until the above incident.

Posted by J at 7:48 AM PST
Updated: Wednesday, December 22, 2004 7:54 AM PST
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Saturday, December 18, 2004
What A Week
Mood:  irritated
Now Playing: Sum 41 - Moron
I'm glad its over. Back to the weekend so I can get back to my other true love, Poker. Its been a good weekend, staying real busy. I haven't had any help on grave because of vacations and stuff, but everyone else has pitched in and things are running smoothly.

I got an urge last week, I bet $110 on the Falcons to beat the Raiders by 4 in the first half. I am glad to say that I won. I got another urge this week on the Steelers beating the Giants by at least 7 in the first half today. I hope I'm right

Fantasy Basketball has been going well, I have a decent lineup. I am about 180 pts behind the leader, with 4180. I just cant seem to catch up to this guy, but Ive been down by 200 or so for 2 now. Heres the lineup:

Wade, Dwyane MIA 12/19 ORL 23.0 5.7 7.2 37.0 983.5 $7,940,000
Hinrich, Kirk CHI 12/18 IND 14.8 3.7 7.1 0.0 651.5 $6,320,000
Gasol, Pau MEM 12/19@LAC 18.9 9.0 2.8 31.0 756.0 $7,270,000
Chandler, Tyson CHI 12/18 IND 9.3 9.8 1.0 0.0 570.5 $3,770,000
Okur, Mehmet UTA 12/19@NY 12.2 6.5 1.6 31.0 572.5 $4,220,000
Francis, Steve ORL 12/18 DEN 21.6 6.1 6.9 0.0 866.5 $7,560,000


About 38 Million or so...... Not bad.

Have Fun

J

PS. $60 Shootout tournament @ Montego Tonight. See you there.

Posted by J at 9:21 AM PST
Updated: Saturday, December 18, 2004 9:24 AM PST
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Friday, December 10, 2004
The Thin Line Between Love and Hate
Mood:  rushed
Now Playing: Audioslave - I Am The Highway
Wow, what a dream. I just woke up and realized that its time for work already.

Last night ranks up there with some of the strangest. The funniest part is that I have been referring to Kooky Chicks lately. Well, I just realized who their queen is. Well call her 'CL'. As you can guess, she was in playing poker last night. Now, the problem with CL is not that she is a stiff. Just the opposite, in fact. I think I got $30 from her in one round. The money was her stab at trying to excuse her gross misbehavior. I had to clean up no less than 2 drinks off the table, settle one very big shouting match, and decline several invitations to 'go upstairs' after work. Not to mention the 3 customers who came to me privately and asked if I could do anything to shut her up.

Now, I'm a sucker for the money. Money talks. Thats what I'm there for. I could feed you some curdled cheese about the love of the game and making friends and a positive impact on society, but its cash that keeps me coming back. I guess thats what made shutting down 'CL' so hard. I tell ya', there's some sort of moral dilemma every day!

I'm just glad she left without making too much of a scene.

Oh yeah, notice to any employees who may be reading this, QUIT COMPLAINING ABOUT YOUR HOURS! I'm not getting any either. Jesus! Its Christmas! If its not busier after new years, I may reopen the complaint department, but for now its closed for the holidays.

Not to be totally negative, I have some great news about my daughter Aurie. This last week she started going to the second grade in the mornings for reading (she is in first grade). Way to go girl! I am so proud of her!

One last apology to you faithful readers, I promise I will try to write more. I have to work at it a little more, but I think it will be worth it. This writing stuff is good for the soul.

J

Posted by J at 10:03 PM PST
Updated: Friday, December 10, 2004 10:07 PM PST
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Thursday, December 9, 2004
More Kooky Chicks?
Mood:  hungry
Now Playing: Snoop Dogg - From Tha Chuuuch to Da Palace
Wonder Why?...........

Posted by J at 1:21 PM PST
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